Book: Proverbs 17
“Starting a quarrel is like opening a floodgate, so stop before a dispute breaks out.”
It is amazing how a small misunderstanding or a lack of communication can easily lead to a major argument or quarrel. If not handled appropriately it is like bringing a can of gas close to an open flame: it will get bigger fast. At that point, the damage that takes place is usually a lot worse than the original issue.
There have been many times in my life that I have misunderstood a person or did not have all the information and was upset at a person or organization. I was even able to build ‘my case’ proving they were wrong only to find out later that I was missing one key piece of information that deflated everything. I have learned it is better to give the benefit of the doubt to the other person and rather than escalate an argument seek for a positive resolution even if it costs.
So who is responsible to stop a quarrel before it gets bigger and out of hand? It is the wise. They step forward, take control of the situation and choose to not add any more fuel to the fire but rather pour out love, calming the situation down. They set their own pride and emotions aside to do what is best and right for all involved. This does not necessarily mean that the other person walks away happy and everything is resolved immediately. Each party still has to deal with their issue of letting go, forgiving and owning their part in the dispute. At least, instead of the argument getting bigger, it gets contained.
I was in a situation where people were very upset due to a misunderstanding of a situation. Wisdom was employed, the dispute was capped but it still took years for some of those people to come around to the point of owning their part. Unfortunately this meant that they missed out on years of friendship with people they use to spend time with. The good news is that the dispute did not totally destroy all involved because of some who were wise!
Next time you feel your emotions rising due to a potential conflict, dispute or argument, take a step back and ask yourself how you can help calm the situation down instead of getting further upset.